Thursday, December 16, 2004

Move that body

Yes, well, while I’m still not eating everything, I am, perhaps, eating more than is strictly called for.

No, not more. Just stuff I wouldn’t eat if it weren’t December and all around me. Last night, I ate chips. Real potato chips, grease and all. Though they were reduced fat chips. They were very good, and I’m not sorry I ate them.

I’ve also eaten some dark chocolate lately.

And I won’t apologise.

Because life is good. I am getting smaller (the other morning, I sat up in bed and stretched, and Taco was all, Oh my god! What, what? I said. He said, you’re melting. You’re melting away. Hardly accurate, but nice nonetheless. And last night, Mean and Crazy Tracey said, just exactly how much weight have you lost? A couple sizes at least?

Truth is I have no idea how much I’ve lost. Can’t seem to get a regular weigh in on the same scale. I may have lost nine pounds, or it may be more like 15. Depends on who you ask, on which day. I’m not too worried about that. And I don’t know about a couple of sizes. I haven’t bought clothes since I started this project. And my clothes are too big for me, for sure, but they’re not actually falling off me yet, so I likely won’t buy any for a bit.

But Taco and I have two weddings to hit in the new year. My not-cousin is getting hitched to his awesome girlfriend. And my great boss and is marrying his awesome girlfriend, who also happens to be an awesome friend of mine, and it’s all very awesome, this unbridled, er, bridal stuff. So there will be new clothes for the weddings, and both are in other cities. Toronto and Winnipeg. With people I won’t have seen for some time. So it’ll be nice to be smaller and healthier and altogether happier than I’ve been in who knows how long.

I’ve been off the workout wagon this week, because I’m sick as a pike. Did some yoga earlier this week, and meant to do more, but then the water heater, as Taco so elegantly puts it, shit the bed, and so this week has been lost to trying to figure it out and get it fixed so I can do laundry before we take off on Saturday on our amazing cross-country Christmas adventure. Plus I’ve had to do a lot of crying, because I am a big baby. And because I’m sick. And I have my period. And did I mention no hot water? Because god hates me!

I’ve been a little worried, to tell you the truth, about losing my momentum. I loved, loved lifting weights with Westy last week, and meant to go again three times this week, but then the sickness, so no lifting for me. And now I’m going away for almost two weeks. And while I will go to Robot Exercise Church while I’m at the ancestral palace, I’ve been worried it won’t be the same. And of course, it won’t be. But it will be something. Which is more than it’s been in years past. And so, I think, I will come out the other side ok. Hoping to come out the other side ok isn’t enough, I know that. I have to exercise some agency in the matter, as well as, you know, just exercising. But I think Taco and I will go on long walks while in Mississauga (the better to smoke dope secretly, I should think), and that will help, as will Curves, in its perverse, knee-hurting way. And I think I’ll take my old friend Gym in A Box with me, too. Might as well have all the help I can muster.

My osteopath said a funny thing to me today. “Your body really wants to move,” he said. And you know? For the first time in my life, I can see that that’s true. That that’s why I have these joints, these fully articulated limbs. They do want to move. It’s what they were made for.

So move they shall. Even if it’s just into a few good yoga poses for now.


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